Be Friend le?

So happy and feel satisfy that we become back like we used to be.. Hmm.. Isit like we used to be? Hmm.. I think so, but nevermind.. This can say is our first step le^^

Happy that we still can talk and laugh with each other..

New Topic

Gotta start new topic.. Everyday repeat and repeat the same topic feel quite boring actually.. Dont mistaken my meaning.. I just trying to tell that I start to forget what had happened between us.. I'm trying to start our relation from the beginning.. Just like new friend.. Please dont mistaken liao.. Haixx... If keep mistaken again, I think it will make us very suffer one.. So, dont mistaken liao, please^^

I will just tell once..

IN SINCERE HEART WHAT I'VE SAID.. NOT MY OWN EARS HEARD IT.. MAYBE IT'S MISTAKEN OR SOMETHING ELSE.. JUST LET IT PASS AS YOU SAY.. LET THEM SINK INTO THE DEEP DEEP WATER.. AND MAYBE IT WILL RETURN TO HOW WE START OUR FRIENDSHIP OR BECOME ORDINARY CLASSMATE.. THIS IS FUTURE THING LET FUTUREE TO JUDGE.. THAT'S IT.. THE END..

Haixx... I know I've say a lot of wrong things.. The madness is controling my head that time.. But we have already agree that let it be, I do really means that let it be past tense, I didn't mean to cheat you all or not sincere one.. NOW, I REALLY PUT IT DOWN ALREADY.. And I do 自我反省 already.. My heart + my brain neither think nor say anything anymore.. And I also din 埋怨 already.. I do know everything started from me, so I also admit it in my heart already.. I din 不服气..

Haixx... Please, please, please... Dont mistaken liao.. That day you all talked to me liao, I really put down le.. And now my brain is fully, completely, in the mode of RATIONAL.. I wont think negative way anymore.. Please trust me.. Now I also didn't listen to the rumours anymore.. No matter what I'll trust IF I really heard it from my OWN ears about the 'gossips'.. So, we just let it be bha.. I really didn't think too much liao.. I also want to be happy in my last secondary life..

不要在误会彼此了~！！我已经放手不再想那些有的没的了。拜托，trust me~!!!

It's Ok Now?

Yesterday, we have a talk already, even it's not finish yet, but I think at least we get some idea on each other.. It's ok now? I dont know.. Truly that it's MY FAULT.. I do not talk on people first.. I'm the first who suspect people and mistaken them.. Funny~!!! From start till end is really I think too much.. Sweat~!!! ><*****
I think they not really can accept m explanation, I think so.. Because every explanation is worst and also been fought back..
Nothing to say, I just can say sorry.. This whole month full of this word.. Dont know you all will accept or not.. But at least I know I've done wrong.. And I'm willing to say sorry to you all, is not been force or wanna be "innocent" person here.. Just know that I'm Wrong le~!!

Haixxx~!!!!

Haixx~!!! Feel myself sososososo WORST~!!!! Why still cant forget the relation between us lea? Already say wanna put down de.. Haixxx~!!!! Keep think about why I wanna be so 'unsteady' to ask them about is it dont treat me as friend.. Keep thinking about it.. Sweat~!!!! Dont know how I gonna mian dui them tomorrow.. Bha.. Ong Ing Ung, you must be more stronger a~!!!! Dont lose your head to start the 'investigation' again.. If not, they will more dislike you.. Haixxx~~!!!! ==^ You can make it de.. Aza Aza.. Hwaiting~!!! >0< Feel so irritate this few days.. So FAN~!!!! What the (.....)~!!! No mood to check on SHINee and FT. Island news also.. Projects, make me more irritate~!! I dont know how to writea, even i get the photos.. I think need teacher's help this time.. Haixx... Dear Chingu, I'll try to make myself happy without having you all around de.. Jie, sorry to make you so worry me, even you already graduate, but I still make you so worry.. I will work hard in my life till end~!!! Hwaiting~!!!

Sorry, I have Misunderstand..

Finally, I get what I wanted to know about.. Phew~!!! Yuan lai you all dislike is my character.. I still thought that is I have said something wrong.. And, Flo, now i get what you mean bout over caring.. Yo doesn't want me to keep look at you all isit, especially when you all gather with others.. Bha.. Why dont you all just tell me lea? Haixx.. Make us so many misunderstanding between us.. Now, misunderstanding hings already untie and you all also beh tahan my character.. Hmm.. Just let us stay peace in school.. Just like ordinary classmates.. No anger, no hatred.. I think you all love it like this more.. I didn't feel any been bully de feeling.. At first, just felt betrayed, but now.. I think I already used to it about the feeling that you all wanted to ignore me.. Well, I will co-operate what you have talked about.. Although that sometimes my eyes will 'accidentally' look at there.. That become a habit le, but I will try to train my eyes not going there de.. Dont worry.. Even that I have said it to you on chatbox, but still wanna say again.. I'M SOSOSOSOSO SOOOORRRYYYYY~!!! I doesn't know that you all didn't talk behind me.. I just heard that someone told me you all talk behind me.. I think I'll choose to trust you all.. But still can't blame people la.. My mouth also very soi xia la, talk about you all when I know that you all talk about me.. But, it just MISUNDERSTAND.. Bha.. Let just stop thinking complicated things.. We just let it over, let it be.. Let it be~!!!! Let just be a simple classmate.. Then you wont increase your hatred from me.. I say that before that I wanna decrease your anger from me, not increasing it.. I hope that you all will be happy together^^ Feel sad is, Daddy, you know everything, but doesn't tell me.. Act DONT KNOW.. Actually, I'm trying to understand you de, pi jing, it's not your stuff and you cant sam pat about it, because no relation to you kan.. And others who knows but hide behind me de.. You know who are you, I just dont want to say out.. Have same comments on my Daddy to you.. I'm trying to understand you all.. Just my own heart feel sad only.. Let me miserable awhile.. I'll be ok and won't hate you all.. Hmm.. If you din '不削' la.. To person who hate me in class and happy that I lost 3 friends, you will get what I have experience now in your future life.. Because, I have this experience before.. I used to have this heart last time, now everything come back to me.. So people who hate me, you also will got it, just dont know when only.. Hmm.. Flo, I'm not talking about you all here.. Dont mistaken.. I'm just emphasizing someone, others.. Well well. Everything has solved.. Hope that everyone got a new FUTURE LIFE.. I hope that I also have friends that accept my character.. Totally accept that type.. Fall down le, just get up and find 1 more if it's not suitable.. Flo, finally I know that why you can be so 潇洒。。 原来你一直用这种想法，看待世界，看待友情。。 I really do admire you, even we quarrel before and I talk behind you and also you dislike me.. I still DO~!!! From my sincere, true HEART.. >0<

100 POST+Just Tell,OK?

Finally got 100 posts in my blog.. Hmm.. Feel shocked that i got so many sadness and happiness things too write about.. But I think most of it are sad things.. Friendship, family.. I'm the one who cant write much, because no idea and also sentence structure not so good.. Today have 2 purpose blogging.. Firstly, congratz myself for writing a lot and express my feeling in straight way.. Well, be a true person is not easy, especially in this reality environment.. Secondly, a talk for some special one--S.. Girls, anything that you all dislike surely you all can come out now.. Dont just tell me is I think too much.. Really or not, I can see and also you all hard to cheat you your own selves.. I wont keep chasing you around anymore.. I promise this time.. Just give me some time to get used to it.. I know you all feel annoyed when I asked you something, interupt yours conversation and also something that I not clear that make you all feel annoyed.. I really wont disturb anymore.. Even you all soooo angry me, but please, dont talk behind me.. You all like this really not 'gentlemen' la.. You all talk behind me for what? If it is really nothing then dont talk behind me la.. My 'talking behind' is a idiom that means gossip.. Judy, please la, dont keep talk about the oral marks anymore.. I know you use a lot of effort to write that script out, I appreciate it.. Thanxx for writing for me, even it's not specially, but still appreciate that I can have my oral test just because of your script.. I know you wanted to have good marks in evey oral, I know that.. But you don't need to keep thinking about it, isn't it? What are you so jealous for? You have a smart brain.. You can get good marks in every exam.. You cant me blame for getting those marks.. I'm not the teacher, I can jugde to get what marks, all I need to do is put all my effort in.. And the script, I memorized for 1 whole month.. Can't I achieve what iI have done before the oral? And also, you get more higher marks than me, even it is 1 mark higher, but is still higher than mine.. You can't blame me on 'cleaning teacher's shoes', I didn't even do this ind of things before.. I've done nothing wrong.. Why you need to say me till like tis? To the truth, I really very 'yuan wang'.. Our oral marks is consider on how the teacher mark it, not I want high marks then I get it.. Please understand me la, ok? I don't know what are you so bu shuang.. You say that you didn't angry on anything, but you treat me so impatiencely.. This call nothing? You say are they problems.. Judy, you can cheat me but you can't cheat what your heart dislike on.. If not, you won't also treat me like this.. At first, you say I'm the first friend you like before, but then change to Florence.. So from that time, you dislike me isit? So then, from that time onwards, tell me what you dislike.. Dont just keep say are their problems.. Ask me ask them only.. You also have to problem on me, isn't it? Florence, you say you aren't dislike me.. Just I over caring you all.. Now I'm confusing what your meaning on over caring? Because I used many ways to change my over caring character, but it still seem that, there are no changes, so I quite confused what you want me to do actually.. It means, I over sticking you all or over annoyed? Or other meaning that I can't get it.. I'm sorry that I'm kind of lacking to get this understand.. If we are friends, aren't friends always stick together? Why can't I stick around with you all? Flo, from your heart, do you really not angry or dislike me? I dont know what I need to do to reduce your anger or dislikeness.. Hmm.. You can tell face to face or msg me, I'll try to reduce it.. Just tell to me, k? Ying, dont know what things make me step on tail to make you get so angry to me.. Hmm.. I know that you also get very impatience with me now.. Sorry to annoyed you to ask you about the things that I always asked.. Well, actually I wanted to ask you from face to face, but everytime when I want to talk with you all, you all seem not welcome me to talk.. So I'm still waiting the chance to have a talk with you all.. See what I've done wrong and I've made you all so angry about me.. I won't simply talk anything when you in shop.. But please don't use that type like order people's word to tell me.. It feels like I'm working under you.. Sorry for saying like this.. I know you will be angry, just please understand me, please.. I didn't mean anything.. i just want to tell out only.. If really make you angry again, I'll just apologize.. Girls, you all keep asked me not to think too much.. Well, I want to, but hard to cheat myself.. Hmm.. How about you all just tell me what's going on.. Then, you all will feel relief that I won't ask again and I also know I should do that won't annoyed you.. I really don't know what's the matter that make you all angry me for 1 whole month.. You all just talk behind me, make me feel more suspicous about what are you blaming on me.. So, just tell bha.. How about we have a talk on Next Wednesday lunch time.. Then I know what should I do about after that..

对不起，伤害过你。

“看完了你写的文章后，我不但没有生气，反而觉得很高兴，因为你终于开窍了，我们少了你不会死掉，你少了我们也不会死掉，所以别在做会让你丢脸的事情了，我坦白跟你说，你认为之前你做的那些伤害我的事情会那么容易得到宽恕吗？那根刺从以前到今日还在我心里，我不是没有尝试把它忘掉去接受你成为我的朋友，而是你当年的无知伤害了别人，你知道吗？你可以当若无其事，你没想过那个人的感受，现在你尝到同感深受，滋味如何？我能肯定，你现在流得泪是我当年流得十分之一，你种的因，结的果就该由你去受。一个人若心有芥蒂是无法轻易去接受道谦。我说的出，我就做得到，希望你说的出也能做的到，我想你明白我指的是什么。” Bii，这真的是你心里话吗？原来你真的那么讨厌我。我从来不晓得。我一直以为你的‘毒舌功’其实是你个人的讲话方式。我从来不知道你的‘毒舌’是冲着我来的。虽然你对盈和Judy没这么‘毒舌’过。我一直忽略你对我的‘特别’，可是现在已经到了无法忽略的地步了。我一直以为你已经释怀了，原来不是，是我太自以为是了。 对，你很了解我，知道我所说的大部分都做不到，而你说指的事情更难。难怪每次都会抱怨我的不是，不太爱理我除了‘必须时’。Judy跟我说，你依然当我是好朋友，当时我还跟他赌了呢。每次跟他赌我都会输，可是今次我赢了，而且还是全胜呢。你的心里从来容忍不了我的存在。可是为什么这么突然就讨厌我了呢？呵~！！我在问废话吗？！你从来都没喜欢过我，不是吗？我一直很期待我跟你们可以一直到毕业呢，就像你跟盈一样。我一直以来都很羡慕你跟她的友情，因为我从来没有过。或许，我的生活太优了吧，上天才把我的友情变得困难重重，抑或许，我真的，干太多坏事了，所以才得不到友情的‘青睐’。 神，您真的要这样吗？一直让我没有朋友到老吗？不是每个人都说，当您关上他们的门时，会开一扇窗给他们吗。为什么我还没看到到您给我打开的窗呢？ 当看到你的文章时，头皮开始发麻了，因为我不想要浮上水面的事情，已浮出来。继续游览你的网页，才知道你对我真的讨厌到无法原谅的地步。我的确是很不不爽，虽然每天见面，但我不会给你两啪，原因一：我的确很狗，害怕你生气，只能用部落格来壮壮胆量；原因二：我伤害过你，在弥补期。我虽然在三八你的事情，可是不用你给我FB的密码。我只想找出我错在哪里，从我错的地方开始改，改到你不在讨厌我，把我当成你的朋友之一。我知道你们没有我也不会死，相反的，我没你们我还是如此。这点，我的确很清楚，因为这很明显。你们少了我，反而让你们想进行的任何计划更顺利，不管是课业或外出计划。我只是想你们有什么事‘稍微’跟我分享下，让我知道你们还有想到我而已。我清楚我自身的身价。对任何人来说，我不过是个路人甲乙丙，而对你们来说，我根本算不上是什么。课业不好，脸蛋不好，基本常识不好，时尚不好，性格不好，这些对你们来说都是刚好相反的东西，也是你们用来沟通的材料。在你们的面前，我从来没有把自己当成是高高在上的人。我一直认为你们可以算是我的学习更多我‘不知道’的事。的确，您这样说已经算是给我面子了，没把我的照片和名字公布在网上来辱骂。以我对你的少许了解，更难听的话，你依然可以说给你讨厌的人听。你这样做的确算是‘稍微’而已。我大概知道你所说‘我的历史’是什么。是指我以前被‘她抛弃’过的事吧。我并不晓得你不愿意听，况且，我说的时候是因为我只是在‘陈述’我为什么这么没有安全感而已。而且，我记得，我只说过一次。不过，还是很抱歉，我让你耳朵受罪了。 我的确在做丢人的事情。心里很不爽，也觉得很委屈。每次都在想，为什么我活的如此卑微，以人心情定我生死。隔天一早，我还是做这种事情。我不是在补过我那天所写的东西，而是我心中虽然不满，可是我还是依然照做。我可以诚实的告诉你们，我也不知道到底是什么东西拒绝我反抗你们，反正就是不想跟你们疏远关系。说真的，不爽我可以直接走人，干么要酱冤枉的继续被奴役。可是就是怕你们不理我，我才乖乖听话吗。Bii，我知道如果你看到我的文章的话，一定会嘲笑我的。可以预想到你不削的神情了。我没有用你们所讨厌的‘悲伤’神情去写这篇‘道歉文章’。 我知道有些事情挑明来说了就没有后路了，要么就‘天堂’，要么就‘地狱’，而显然我的‘好运气’是地狱。重复又重复的读着真的让自己回想到，我真的如此恶劣，如此不被需要吗？我不知道能够说什么，也不知道该说些什么，只是真的觉悟了，我原来真的那么令人讨厌。 到毕业以前，我会尽量让自己不被你讨厌的。我一定会把自己撑到那个时候的。也希望，你心中的那根刺会随着我的毅力和时间慢慢地被我拔出来。你说得对，自己种的因，结的果当然是自己承担。所以，我现在会为自己所做的事情负起责任的。你心中的那根刺，我拔定了。虽然不知道会不会成功，可是不试过怎么会知道结果呢。 在这里，我郑重的跟你道歉。 Bii，对不起。我为我当年做过的事跟你道歉。我不知道我的无知可以让你伤的那么深。虽然事隔多年，你还是无法谅解，也无法让我靠近你的心里，成为你真正的朋友，可是你是我最欣赏的朋友，也是现在我想争取的朋友，我不会放弃让你承认我是你的朋友的。 我知道你会觉得我很可笑，也觉得很白痴，可是这是我心里的想法。我知道你真的真得很，非常的讨厌我，但是，我依然希望你用全新的态度再次评估我是否适合。这是我的小小要求而已，希望你能够成全我。